Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go of Control

“I kind of love my title for this podcast. It’s very ambitious. Let’s fix it all!”

And so begins another Ladies Fixing the World conversation in which Cecilie Conrad, Sandra Dodd and I dive deep into unschooling, sharing our thoughts and experiences. In S2E4, we discuss Unschooling: Trusting the Process and Letting Go.  

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Show Notes

Traditional education is built on judgment—constantly measuring children’s progress against rigid standards. Unschooling offers a different path, one that values curiosity over evaluation. In this episode, Cecilie Conrad, Sue Elvis, and Sandra Dodd discuss why letting go of expectations leads to deeper, more natural learning.

Reading becomes a key theme, as they challenge the idea that children must read by a certain age. Cecilie shares how her son resisted reading until fourteen, only to become an avid reader once the pressure was gone. Sandra and Sue add their own stories, showing how literacy develops when children are given space and trust.

Repetition in learning also comes up—whether it’s rewatching movies, rereading books, or replaying games. What looks like stagnation is often mastery in progress. The conversation extends to Shakespeare, storytelling, and the power of learning through real experiences rather than forced instruction.

Unschooling isn’t about avoiding education—it’s about trusting that learning happens everywhere. This episode is a reminder that children thrive when given the freedom to explore life on their own terms.

Links & Resources:

• Sandra Dodd’s Website: SandraDodd.com – Explore Sandra’s favorite unschooling definitions and in-depth discussions.
• Sue Elvis’ Blog: Stories of an Unschooling Family – Practical advice and insights into Sue’s unschooling journey.
• Cecilie Conrad’s Website: CecilieConrad.com – Learn about Cecilie’s experiences with unschooling, worldschooling, and a life of freedom and curiosity.

A Few Unschool Quotes

Would you like a taste of our conversation? Here are several things I said:

[00:12:00]
“We had to conform to the registration requirements, but we never compromised what we were doing. We just found a way around them. I had to separate the paperwork from our real learning life. I called it ‘behind-the-scenes stuff’—just ticking boxes off, noting when I thought my kids had done something that would satisfy the system, but without letting it interfere with our everyday life. My kids had no idea about the paperwork. I kept it hidden because I didn’t want it affecting their experience. They were free to learn, explore, and grow, while I just made sure we ‘looked responsible’ to the system.

[00:36:00]
“Our kids all develop in their own time, but we have a role as parents to recognize them for who they are and not push them into somebody else’s idea. I learned this with my second child, a son. My first child read at six, and I was so proud. I thought, ‘I’m a great mother, I’ve made the right choices.’ And then my second child didn’t read at six. And I panicked. I was worried about what I would say at our homeschooling registration. And then—just a week before our next registration visit—he sat down and read an entire book to me. Like he had always known how. And I realized how much time I had wasted worrying instead of trusting.”

[01:00:00]
“If we push too hard at the wrong time, we turn a skill into something frightening. A burden. Something they don’t want to learn anymore. I learned this lesson with swimming. I signed my son up for swim lessons when he was four. The teacher insisted that all the kids put their heads underwater on a specific day. My son wasn’t ready. He did it, but he was terrified. And from that day, he refused to go near water. For years, he clung to the edge of pools while other kids swam. It wasn’t until he was 12 that he came to me and said, ‘Mum, I’d like to learn to swim.’ And with the right teacher, in his own time, he did. He conquered his fear and enjoyed it. But it took years because it had been forced on him too soon. I see this happening with reading, writing, and so many other skills. When we push, we often create resistance.”

If that sounds interesting, you could watch or listen to the whole episode. It’s full of thoughts and ideas to ponder. I think you’ll enjoy it!