About a month ago, I wrote the following story for my unschooling community:
This morning, I didn’t want to go for a run. It was cold, I was tired, and I had no one to run with. Running seemed too difficult.
Each morning for the last five days, I’ve found a reason not to head out the door just after sunrise to run along the bush tracks at the end of our road. I’ve been thinking: do I still want to be a runner? If I give up running, I can stay home when it’s cold. I don’t have to make an effort when I’m tired. It could be good.
But then I decided that being a runner is important to me. Running is part of who I am. I like being fit. I enjoy running once I’m out there in the bush. I like the challenge of running. And it’s great when I meet another runner and we wave at each other. I’m part of the tribe.
I’ve been thinking about how our identity is made up of different labels. I’m a blogger, a writer, a podcaster, a runner… I could be a vegetarian, but I’m not. I’m definitely a Christian. Of course, I’m an unschooler.
I’ve been wondering if our identity can be associated with labels that define our character. What labels would I like? Do I want to be a punctual person, someone who’s reliable, a gentle mother, a kind friend, a loving wife… ?
Thinking of ourselves as runners or reliable people or gentle mothers or vegetarians requires us to adopt the defining features of the label. If we stop doing the required things, we become, for example, an ex-podcaster, an unreliable person, an ex-runner.
Telling ourselves we are particular kinds of people can help us stay on track.
“I’m a gentle mother so I won’t yell.”
“I’m a punctual person so I will allow plenty of time to get to the meeting.”
“I’m a podcaster so I shall make a podcast.”
We know what we need to do. Of course, we might sometimes fail. Then we have the opportunity to examine who we want to be. Do we want to let go of a particular label and no longer be defined by it? Or is the label important? Is it part of our identity, part of who we are?
So, this morning, I decided that I don’t want to give away the runner label. I’m a runner and runners run. I found a pair of gloves and put a light jacket over my running gear, and then I headed out into the cold morning. And it wasn’t so bad. I warmed up quickly. I enjoyed being alone on the tracks. I came home feeling good. I’m glad I am not an ex-runner.
In that story, I wrote: “I’m a podcaster so I shall make a podcast.”
But for more than a month, I didn’t make any podcasts. Maybe I was in danger of becoming an ex-podcaster. But that’s no longer true. Yesterday, I recorded a new podcast episode!
In episode 173, I’m talking about:
00:00 Intro
01:05 Casual Work and Gemma-Rose
06:22 Unschooling Community
07:11 Unschooling Challenges
09:28 Resources, Links, Questions, Photos
10:57 Book Club Discussion Group
12:14 Nothing Is More Important than Love
17:38 Children’s Book Club
20:02 Homeschooling Global Summit
25:09 A-Z Unschooling Stories
28:21 Clock Watching
35:33 Impressing Other People
43:10 End Stuff
I hope you will listen!
Show Notes
Blog Posts
The Homeschooling Global Summit
The Homeschooling Global Summit
Our 2019 Homeschooling Global Summit Interviews
My Unschooling Books
Curious Unschoolers: paperback
Radical Unschool Love: paperback
Where You Can Find Me
Youtube
Blogs
Stories of an Unschooling Family
Things You Could Do
Share the link so that we can spread the word about unschooling.
Register for the 2020 Homeschooling Global Summit.
Watch our 2019 Homeschooling Global Summit interviews.
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Thank you for listening to this episode!
Photo: this is my daughter Gemma-Rose in the cafe where she works.
Hi Sue! I tend to make labels for myself, too! However, I also realized lately that some activities in my life do not need to end but just become a smaller part of my life and that’s okay!
I am a runner, like you, and have run several 5Ks and 10Ks. Then I wondered if I should progress to half marathons and marathons. However, the amount of training necessary for those is more than I want to devote to running at this time of my life with 4/5 kids still at home. I read an article once about a man who concentrates completely on 5Ks. He even travels for them. Sometimes people ask if he is doing a marathon and he says no – a 5K. They seem surprised. However, he makes a good case for being a 5Ker. You can train in just 30-40 minutes several times a week (less time if you are faster). It is a little gentler on your body than say a marathon. I think there were other reasons but I can’t remember them all. I like that. I like being a runner but not pressuring myself to be a marathoner.
Gina
Gina,
I love your observation that some activities can become a smaller part of our lives. Yes, they don’t have to disappear completely. For example, I don’t need to be a weekly podcaster. I could podcast once a month without giving up that label.
I’ve also thought about distance running. At the moment, I’m finding it hard to motivate myself to keep up with my 5 K runs. But is 5 K good enough? Lots of people run much further. Perhaps I’m not doing enough. But I’m happy at this distance. Like you said, running long distances requires a lot of time training, and I don’t want to do that. I found your story about the 5 K runner very reassuring. Yes, I don’t have to pressure myself to run long distances. I can have the label ‘5K runner’!
Gina, your comment was so helpful. Thank you! I hope all is well with you and your family!