If we conclude that good mental, physical, and spiritual health requires silence, nature, real people, and exercise, what does this mean for our unschooling kids? Should we limit their screen time? Should we force them off their devices and make them exercise and spend time with us? Perhaps we should announce we’re having a screen-free day, and everyone must spend time hiking through the bush. Or won’t that work?
When we research a question, we often know the answer we’re looking for. We just want someone to back up what we’ve already decided. So, if we find an opposing opinion, we move on quickly and search for something more aligned with our beliefs. We’ll find it if we look long enough because it’s possible to find evidence for every belief online. Although very convenient, this might not be helpful. If we search the Internet with preconceived ideas about what we want to discover, will we judge anything fairly?
I always pass over negative articles about limiting kids’ screen time. I don’t consider the arguments. I don’t want to know because I know what type of person writes such things: they’re not unschoolers.
Recently, I’ve been adding silence to my days, like walking with the dogs without the background noise of a podcast. My mind, tight with information overload tension, has had a chance to relax out of its rigid patterns and ponder more deeply. It’s been thinking without the aid of the latest must-read article or trending video.
It was difficult at first to turn off my phone and be silent. I wondered if I was missing out on something essential online. But I realised we don’t need most of the information the Internet bombards us with. All it does is keep our minds so busy we have no time or space to consider what is really true or false.
As I’ve been strolling through the bush listening to the cockatoos screeching instead of a human voice coming from the other side of the world, I’ve been turning over this thought: perhaps we shouldn’t be on our devices all the time. If we’re tied to the Internet are we truly free? Could we need more silence instead of more information in our lives? And what about opportunities to exercise? How about time spent face to face with the members of our families and our friends? Is time outside in nature essential for our souls?
If we conclude that good mental, physical, and spiritual health requires silence, nature, real people, and exercise, what does this mean for our unschooling kids? Should we limit their screen time? Should we force them off their devices and make them exercise and spend time with us? Perhaps we should announce we’re having a screen-free day, and everyone must spend time hiking through the bush.
You know what? I don’t think any of that will work. I once tried to force my daughter to exercise. It was a painful experience. I soon learnt that it’s not respectful or productive to control kids. So, I never limited screen time or forced my kids outside, but I can imagine the tension in families when parents start trying to control these and other activities.
So what do we do?
Could the answer begin with a parent’s example? Could it have a lot to do with the connections between parent and child? How about the rich, nurturing atmosphere we build up within our homes?
Could encouraging kids to develop practices that are essential for their good health have everything to do with unschooling after all?
I’d love to hear your thoughts!
Something to Listen to
Of course, the Internet gives us access to a lot of good stuff, like The Ladies Fixing the World podcast. Why not listen to the latest episode, and then be silent while you ponder the ideas and thoughts we shared?
Some Posts to Read
What if We’d Like Our Kids to Be Early Risers?
Encouraging Each Other to Do Difficult Things
A Balanced and Productive Unschool Life
Can We Force Kids to Exercise?
Images
Sometimes, unschooled kids are willing to get up at 4:30 am to experience the beauty of the sun and the mist rising over the river.
One of the things that has really turned me off from the unschooling is that many unschoolers advocate for allowing children to spend as much time as they want on screens. I’ve researched both sides and for me the evidence is that some forms of screen use are very addictive, especially for children and teens. Have you read The Anxious Generation? We’ve chosen to not use video games (we have close family with video game addiction) or social media. We do use a tablet or tv for watching movies, listening to music, art/drawing videos etc and those things are done in balance and as a family. My older children are learning typing and we will sometimes look up articles on things we are interested in.
I love what you said about example! I personally limit my own screen time, a lot, as there are so many other things to do because scroll social media or Facebook. I do enjoy blogs and am a bit sad that blogging isn’t very popular anymore. We spend loads of time together reading and going outside, and those are things we all love doing together.
Tania,
Yes, it can be worrying when kids are on screens all day but not thriving. We want them to be healthy and happy.
Growing up, my kids spent a lot of time on their devices – I did too – but they also had many offline interests like running. They weren’t attracted to social media and played video games on and off. I never considered limiting screens because I wasn’t worried about my kids’ health and happiness. They worked things out for themselves.
However, I’ve pondered this issue because it comes up a lot while I’m blogging. I haven’t come to any definite conclusions- it seems very complicated – but I wonder about the practicalities of limiting time on devices. How does that work? Are kids involved in these decisions? Or are there battles when parents enforce screen rules?
It’s sounds like your family is like ours: lots of reading and outside activities and time together. I wonder if building up a close and rich family atmosphere within a home is important.
I’m also sad about the decline of blogging. I used to love the days when we’d share our stories and enjoy reading each other’s posts. I made a lot of wonderful blogging friends before most of them migrated to social media.
Tania, it’s been so good to chat. Thanks for stopping by!