Confident to Be Me

8Love and acceptance are so very important. They give our kids the confidence to go out into the world and be themselves.

This post was written by my daughter Imogen.

It’s easy to recognize the Elvis Gang when we’re on the move. There’s us four (at-home) girls and Mum, tunic dresses fluttering over denim leggings, striking a ridiculous pose for a photo by a classical statue in a garden, striding through the Australian bush, or maybe just taking an epic quest to the shopping centre to buy the groceries. We’ll be gathered in a gaggle, chatting and laughing the whole time, our conversation moving briskly through a strange mix of movie quotes, practical concerns such as the shopping list, an in-depth discussion of the concepts behind book cover design, and a deep dissection of some movie or tv show we’ve just watched. When we’re all together, it doesn’t matter who’s looking at us. We are comfortable being ourselves.

When you find us together, it’s hard to immediately recognize that we’re introverts. We can be loud and excitable. We love going places together and exploring new things. Any trip can be an adventure for us. We like taking a long time to read every signboard, discussing history, walking for miles enjoying the silence of the bush, and straying off the beaten path. And then we also like going home and being alone for a while to rest and recharge. We like avoiding parties where we know we won’t be comfortable, and crowded places that we find stressful and exhausting. As a family, we know who we are, and how we most prefer to live. And we are the happiest when we’re true to what our real selves are.

It can feel dangerous to be yourself sometimes. What if people don’t like the person you really are on the inside? What if they get bored by the things you’re passionate about? What if they think your hobbies are strange? What if they don’t get any of the movie quotes or subtle references you slip into your conversation and just think you’re weird? What if they think that you’re being unfriendly or anti-social when you don’t want to go to parties or be in loud places because you’re introverted? What if people resent you for saying ‘no’, even though it’s the best thing for you? It can be difficult to know how to fit into the rest of the world without feeling that you’re losing something of yourself, to feel confident in being who you really are without wondering if you’re being judged negatively for it.

When the Elvis Gang gets together and we’re in a big, happy, family group, this is something I rarely have to think about. What does it matter what other people are thinking as long as we’re having a good time? We’re not judging each other. When you have likeminded people around you, people who are also being themselves, it builds your confidence in who you are. My family loves and accepts me even though I have a tendency to go way too deep analysing movie plots in casual conversation, and frequently get so excited while speaking that I stop making sense. When I’m with my family, I don’t have to be anyone other than who I am.

When you have a family who accepts you, it’s easier to be yourself wherever you go. You learn confidence from the love and acceptance they give you, and from their encouragement and support. And that is something I can take with me wherever I am, whether we’re taking the shopping centre by storm, or whether I’m adventuring on my own. Maybe people won’t always like every part of me. But that’s okay. Because I have people behind me who value who I really am and show me my true worth, people who remind me that my real self is worth sharing. They give me confidence which sets me free to be me.

About Imogen

Imogen is a writer and occasional Youtube musician. You can find her on her blog Write | Rewrite | Read and her Youtube channel. She is also on Twitter and Instagram.

Images: These photos were taken by my daughter Sophie during a recent visit to a local open garden. As you can see, we had a fun day out together!